Another bitter Sunday. I think I made some progress on the social phobia front: I managed to buy a magazine at the bookstore without taking off my glasses. But, my friends, I am going through life without being able to make meaningful connections with anyone. I am constantly reminded of that poem by Constantine Cavafy, 'The Walls' that, loosely translated says 'without my knowledge, they shut me outside the world'. Can you imagine dear readers, what it feels like to live in the world and at the same time feel that you've been shut out of it? You can only understand if you've been there. There was one shining moment when I truely stepped out of myself and conected to someone and that was a moment of intense light, a flood of light, an ocean of light.